So much time is spent doing - laundry, dishes, sweeping and vacuuming, dusting, cooking, tending to three kids. No matter how much you get done, it always comes back to do all over again the next day. Maybe some enjoy doing these things (what?!). But they don't bring me fulfillment. Yes, my children bring me joy. Just not all the menial tasks that come with raising them.
Why do we spend so much of our days doing things that leave us feeling empty?
I will no longer starve myself. I will do something creative every day. It doesn't have to be grand. It could be something that takes just five minutes. But I will do something. Stitch, carve, forge, photograph, draw, or just doodle. Creating, arting is what makes my heart sing and my soul fly. Shouldn't we be helping them to do that every day? Fill them up with the things that make our days beautiful.
A simple toy. Ten minutes to stitch and fill the fish with catnip. Less than 60 seconds for Luna to tear a hole and scatter catnip all over the floor.
lol...cats are the ultimate Zen masters...
ReplyDeletehearing you on all of this....and i'm realizing that showing my children that time to feed my soul is important is one of the greatest gifts i could give them.
here's to the reclamation!
xo
ditto to what mel said.
ReplyDeletei have decided that i will never live in a large house again. as long as there is space to create, the rest is functional (ok, i don't do teeny spaces, we all have a certain amount of space we need to breathe). living in this first small place after our large home in montenegro, well, 5mins and the vacuuming is done downstairs!
the other thing i do is that housework is a shared experience. this works for both me and my girl - i get to not feel it's drudgery, and she gets to learn that housecleaning is part of life and to feel part of caring for the home. if i remember (it doesn't come naturally) we'll sing songs in in progress.
Lastly, and this is important b/c i think we can easily allow it to happen - never EVER do housework with alone time. despite that i really don't need reminding on that one, even i have caught myself going to wash dishes when she's gone to bed. i stop, leave for morning.
anyway, good on you for reclaiming back creative time. i also have to say, i so enjoy the wabi sabi-ness of your toys.
we live in a small house according to American standards, yet I would still love to downsize! lol
Deletehow I love to find the beauty in the imperfect. wabi sabi-ness....thank you.
I feel you. I always want to insert something creative in my to-do list every day. I feel blah when I haven't don't any *meaningful* stuff at the end of the day.
ReplyDeleteYES! I make sure to do two things every day - be creative and take a deep breath outside. If I can get those two things in I feel whole and oh so grateful to be alive :)
ReplyDeleteI TOTALLY get it.
ReplyDeleteHowever, I do try and see it this way. If there were no family to pick up after, cook for, clean for, tend to, I would not even want to be on this planet AT ALL.
So, I try and do it with all joy and then get it overwith (especially the laundry) as quick as possible. Sometimes I almost cry, because there is so much fucking laundry (sorry) and it's all OVER THE PLACE and their closet is really small. Then they want a snack (AGAIN??????!!!) It gets old, fast. But I do it in little bits and am creative in the meantime. And I remind myself of how much I really do love it, I only can see that if I imagine life w/out it.
XO
first, don't ever apologize for saying "fuck"! If I wrote this blog the way I would speak to you if you were sitting at my table with me "fuck" would be included in every post. lol!
Deletethe snacking!! my son eats 5, sometimes 6 times before lunch! I'm so thankful that I have the people to clean after, please don't misunderstand. I guess I'm frustrated at the fact that so many people, especially SAHM's, lose their identity once they have kids. All of their energy and time is devoted to the family and she neglects herself. Fuck that. I'm not going to push my needs to the side anymore. I am more than just mom and wife. :)
xo
Yep, C nailed it. Fucking laundry and I do cry about it! The snacks fall under the fuck category for me too. I neglect myself. I take after my mama. Trying to remember the Jess before all of this, she seems so foreign to me, but I know she is there and she is vital to my position as mother. Its all part of the ride, no?
ReplyDeleteOh goodness yes. You deserve those 5 minutes if not more!!!! Guilt sucks and I think I am finally letting it go when it comes to housework (turning 40 was a big push to saying screw guilt). Oh, and housework doesn't bring me fulfillment either. I have a friend who spends a lot of time cleaning and she says it makes her feel better. Hell no, not me. I mean, I do what needs to be done, usually when I just can't stand looking at the mess anymore, hehe. But my creativity, that chance to cut leather, try a new embroidery stitch ( yesterday, yippee!!), or knit a few rows, those moments are what I look forward to everyday. I bet your kids love to see your creations, more than they care to see a clean room :)!! Anyway, create on my lovely friend, all that other stuff is not going anywhere ;)!!
ReplyDeletexoxox
yes yes yes
ReplyDeletedon't starve yourself sister
the best gift we can give our children is the gift of seeing us take care of ourselves
it is a challenging time when children are young...and even as they get older, their needs change and amy take more emotional investment and stretching on our part...all time consuming
I love you passion to create, so important and something that is not readily embraced in our north american culture
I admire you for going forth and carving this time for you
you are a good mama for doing so
Aho sister
love and light
go for it. my mum starved herself by doing menial tasks over and over again and not taking care of herself. eventually it starved our relationship. you're not just doing yourself a favor. your kids will love you for it, too. xxx
ReplyDeleteJust read your post after having housecleaning binge - totally over it. my policy over our summer holiday was to spend time with my girl - all good but now she is back at school need massive catch up before we drown in laundry! Have decided my issue is we have way too many clothes . Small house - but too much shit! This afternoon am going to doing something creative for me - all about balance.
ReplyDeleteFound your blog via owl and twine - love your blog so will be back.