The Blue Chair

I love everything old and worn, tattered and torn,
chipped and cracked, faded and rusted.  Everything that shows how much it was used and loved.
Things that have a history, even though I don't always know what the history is.
The not knowing adds to the magic.  It allows me to imagine, to create stories
about who had the piece before me.  They add to the stories of my own home.

I found this little wooden chair with it's perfectly chipped blue paint.

Paying $10, it was a little more than I wanted to pay, but I knew if I walked away

I would regret it with my first step.  I'm happy I kicked my stubbornness to the curb.

A patchwork seat cushion, and she'll be perfect at the desk,

or at my sewing table, or maybe in the living room with a stack of scrappy quilts.

Sharing with Cory.

(She will be painted with a clear encapsulant.  Should the paint contain lead, and most
from before 1970 do, this will prevent exposure.  I love objects with old, chippy paint.
 I do not like my kids being exposed to toxins.)

Weekend

~ lots of yard sales and flea markets,

coming home with a few fantastic finds

~ camping out

kids have fun, even when it's only in the back yard

~ birthday dinner for a now 21 y.o. nephew

~ possibility of sister-in-law moving in, temporarily

~ weeding, watering, planting - tending to the gardens

~ taking a lot longer than I anticipated to weed and plant

the little chicks (not so little anymore) were right there waiting to

get any bugs, grubs, and worms that surfaced or were turned over in the dirt

some decided to take dirt baths around my just-planted herbs

had to cover the plants with the dirt the chicks dug up

~ have more "weeds" than grass, 

so our lawn looks like a meadow filled with wildflowers

I love it!

~ discovered a big patch of wild strawberries

~ a weekend filled with warmth, sunshine, and so much goodness

Sharing my Weekend with Amanda

Nine

I'm a terrible entertainer.

Correction - I'm a terrible at entertaining family in my home.

For over a week, I've been battling anxiety and pain from stress headaches.

All because we had family come to the house this weekend.  I love my family.

But, I don't love the judgement and criticism from them.  I don't even think they

realize they do it, they've been doing it for so long.

 "My, you sure do have a lot of weeds in your gardens."

"Don't you think  you should paint the walls?  They havea lot of scribbles on them."

"Your home could be nice if you could just remodel the kitchen and bathroom."

~ They're not weeds.  They're wild, medicinal plants. 

Some of which I have infusing in oil for future salves.

~ I prefer to think of the scribbles as custom artwork from the children.

~ What the fuck?! 

But, I suck it up, inhale my lavender oil, and deal with it.

Because of this little girl.

She turned 9 on Sunday.

She deserves to have everyone who loves her be there to celebrate with her.

Mistakes & Lessons

"If you have made mistakes, even serious ones, 

there is always another chance for you.  What we call failure

is not the falling down, but the staying down."

Mary Pickford

After too long of being unhappy, angry, and hurt, I broke.  I sought revenge.

In a quest to find happiness, mistakes were made.  Tremendous feelings of guilt. 
A lot of lessons.  A lot of personal and spiritual growth.

Yes, I screwed up.

But, the past is in the past.  It can't be changed.  The past doesn't define me.
What will define me are the lessons that I learned, and how I take them with me to the future.

I am who I choose to become.  I can't look to others to make me happy. 

Only I am responsible for my happiness.  The satisfaction of revenge is short-lived,
while the feelings of remorse stay for a long time.  The ones who love you,
truly love you with an open mind and an open heart, know you're only human, look past your
mistakes, and love you more, regardless of the fact that you're not perfect.
The rest, the ones who judge, forgetting that we all make mistakes, don't matter.

"Every saint has a past and every sinner has a future."
Oscar Wilde

I've grown a lot in the last couple of years.
I still have a lot of growing to do.  A lot of learning, evolving.
But, I love the person I've become.
Mistakes and all.

a spin on Keeping It Real

and this, just because

Almost Four

When all of my kids were babies, I had a habit

of rubbing my cheek on the top of their head when holding

them up by my shoulder, when burping, then cuddling after they fell asleep.

The soft peach fuzz against my skin was like a drug.

So, after my baby decided he wanted his hair cut really short, 

climbed into my lap and fell asleep....with his head on my shoulder...

I couldn't help but rub my cheek against his head, again.

The little man is turning 4 on Saturday.

Time is moving way too fast for this mama's liking.

Weekending

~ worked at the florist/greenhouse to help get ready for mother's day

~ lazy quick pasta dinners

~ sleeping in

~ backyard foraging

~ dandelion fritters for lunch

~ wild violets and dandelions soaking (separately, silly) for jelly making tomorrow

~ stopping to smell the lilacs, several times

~ forgetting to cut lilacs for a bouquet to keep inside

~ finding the perfect branch for a tire swing

Weekending with Amanda

Love The Light, Endure The Darkness

I will love the light, for it shows me the way.
Yet, I will endure the darkness, for it shows me the stars.
~ Og Mandino

sunrise in the woods

darkness

a sick child ~ head colds and migraines for me ~ exhaustion for several days
the need to pull away, retreat into my Cancerian shell, and take a blog break


light

letting go of the guilt and realizing that it's okay to listen to what my body
is telling me it needs, to take a nap ~ falling asleep curled up with a sleeping
almost-4-year-old ~ morning rain to keep everything watered ~ afternoon sun
to allow the kids to play outside, having adventures in the woods ~ the loveliest emails


Keeping it Real with Monica